One day you’re on top of the world, happy, making good money, doing real good. But if you’re naturally unstable like me, one day, you’re going to spiral. This comes in a lot of different forms. Sometimes it just my disorder acting up, and I’ll find myself literally unable to get off the couch. Maybe you’ll lose your job, maybe one of your relationships will go to shit. It happens. But for your mental health, it’s very important to know how to deal with your life going to shit. Because all it takes is one bad day. Recently, an onset of my BPD led me to let things start going to hell and I remembered why keeping your priorities straight durning this time was important.
Here’s some advice I’ve learned to surviving the spirals of life;
Before the spiral:
If you’re prone to them like ours, it’s important to take preventative measures to insure you, your health, your career, etc. Will all be safe and reparable.
- Maintain good relationships- With your family, any friends you may have, and your boss. This will make your inevitable distance much easier for them and yourself.
- Have an emergency fund set up- work really hard to save enough money for when this time hits. Whether you lose track of bills or have to miss some work, this will make the financial blow much easier.
- Confide in those you’re comfortable with- You might have a problem telling people at work that you’re prone to extreme lows. That’s fine. I told one of my managers last time it hit. The one i work with the most. Even if others get irritated with me, I know that he’ll explain to any higher ups that start asking questions.
- Have reminders set up- Bill due dates, classes and court, maybe even scheduled family or friend times. If you have these things set up, it can be a huge motivator to get out of the house.
- Do good- When your on your game you should do good at work, do good at school, do good with cleaning and cooking and be a good person. I consider myself a great employee, an amazing friend, and a decent caretaker. When I crash though, It’s been a good day if I wash my clothes. Always do your best, if your a too performing employee USUALLY, your boss won’t hold a few bad days over your head.
- Seek therapy or medication- This wont always prevent spirals, but it can make them much easier to deal with. Also, doctors notes for work and school.
During the spiral:
This is definately a difficult time to try to remember things can get better. But it will. A lot of times, you’ll just feel like the whole world is crashing down. But you are string and you will survive.
- Reach out- If everything is way too much, you NEED to find some release. Having someone to help you deescalate you will be extremely helpful.
- Take care of yourself- I know this is one of the last things you’ll think of, but sometimes brushing your hair, and cleaning your apartment can encourage you to just do a little bit more. Makes all the difference.
- Indulge yourself- If a syarbuck will make you happy, go het that damn frappucino. If a new pair of shoes will lift your confidence, don’t sweat another 20$.
- Mental health days- Not a lot of places offer these, but it’s between having an embarrassing mental breakdown at work (it happens) and calling in sick once, believe me it will be MUCH easier.
Shit gets rough sometimes, sometimes we get so caught up taking care of everything else we forget to take care of ourselves. As unbelievable as it may seem, sometimes we need these wake up calls to remind us that it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes.
My sister is so talented. Really, she’s so great at so many things. Her biggest weakness is working. It’s weird how I got that drive and she didn’t. Granted it was pretty flip-flopped when we were younger. But I think she could really make this one work for her.
So we are eaters. Not gonna lie binge-eaters is probably a more appropriate word, BUT I want to keep this one light-hearted. I love making facebook pages for people.
I did one for my art:
I did one for my aunt’s bottles: https://www.facebook.com/Belvitro/
And now I am working on one for my sisters delicious macarons:https://www.facebook.com/alittlemacarondelight/
I didn’t get the name. (Like a little afternoon delight) I told her we should’ve made it “Thugg Boots Macarons” But she obviously didnt get it.
This is a lot of fun for me though, I love working on my promoting and advertisement skills. And I like investing in thing for no more than my free time.
See I try to motivate everyone around me in every way I can, because I am absolutely DESPERATE to have others in my life that crave success in the same way that I do.
Hopefully soon, I will be helping her make a blog to share her process, her recipes, and more delicious picture of her Macarons!
That’s that for now, just wanted to give my two-cents about my newest venture. Thanks guys!
I am a proud ex-party girl. I know. With all the lame shit I post on here, you probably wouldn’t have guessed.
Yes, going from a little hoodrat to a moderately successful, workaholic was a very strange transition. One I, and everyone who knew me, never expected me to make.
There’s a lot more to this whole “adult” thing than I expected. There were a lot of things that had to change to get to where I am. A lot of lessons that were really hard to learn.
- Functionality is key. I love decorating everything and I never understood minimalism. Until I had absolutely no time to deal with extra. I never imagined living in the same 8 outfits, yet here I am.
- Friends forever means you either stay a child, or try to raise your friends to your level. Neither of which I have time to do. Sad but true, few of my friends got to contunue being in my life. Negativity is too draining theese days. Still love them and wish them the best, but I have to be around people with aspiration to be better.
- Partying is only fun when you don’t have to work the next day. And even then, you think of the laundry sitting in a pile, the dishes in the sink, the bill you have an hour left to pay. Yes, I miss it occasionally. But I don’t make plans to spend tine with people who only want to drink or waste away on the couch.
- You realize little things you thought you needed, are a total waste of money. I can make a better (and stronger) macchiato at home. Yeah it’s not as cool without the green straw, but it’s still delicious.
- It really is about the little things. The 4th weeks of doubles, I broke down and started bawling. I missed my grandma. The next day (my day off) I went to her house and gave her the biggest hug I think I ever had in my life. And just like that I had enough fight to go back to work the next day with a huge smile on my face.
- Most people arent happy or even proud of you. And as much as I hate to break it to you, it’s not because they’re jealous. The thing is, especially being young, most people dont think of it as a priorty. They have several small short term goals and don’t even realize there is a bigger picture.
- You’re boring. I’m sorry. Really, I am. It was the hardest thing in the world for me to accept. Yes, you can be funny and smart and awesome. But they just see someone who doesn’t go out and doesn’t have any drama in there life. That’s not exciting for them to hear about. Nobody cares how much OT you got last week. If it makes you feel any better I’m excited for you.
- You get really picky about how and who you spend your time with. You so rarely have actual free time, you start to question whether or not you want to go hang out with some guy that blows you off every other week. You wonder if you’d rather take a nap or finish that book you’ve been reading.
- You’ll begin to realize life isn’t as complicated as it was when you were living the day to day. You aren’t worried about what you’re doing next weekend. You worry about whether or not you should renew your lease or look for a house.
- And finally, you’ll probably get lonely. Like I said before, especially when you’re young. It’s hard to meet other 20-somethings that want to rule the world. Even harder to find others that actually put in the leg work.
But keep your head up. Remember your life is about you and those you care about. Eventually you’ll cross paths with ithers with the same goals and aspirations as you, and you’ll remember you’re alienated. Not an actual alien.
When I first moved out, my biggest worry was money. How the hell am I supposed to handle ALLL THISSS by myself?!? It wasn’t my first time on my own, but it was my first time not having an excuse to fail.
I got used to it real quick and I loved living by myself. Without going into too much detail, back in march my friend and his son hit some hard times. So I offered them a room. The only room. I sleep on my insanely comfortable couch so I figured i wouldn’t miss the space. I do. My little studio was the perfect size for me and my stuff, but me and a roomate AND a baby. Not too well. But for 1/2 the rent I decided it would be worth it.
My only other roomate was a literal psychopath, so I cant really complain. Make it so or do or do without, right?
There’s good and bad things about deciding to have a roomate. Less rent is pretty awesome. Less space kind of sucks. Helps with chores is cool. But only if they pull their own weight.
If you are thinking of allowing 1 &1/2 people into your space, heres somethings you need to think about and soem things to help you transition.
- Get rid of any and everything. Clothes, furniture, filler food you’ll never eat, extra hangers, I mean EVERYTHING you dont need. Every. Single. Thing. Try to do it BEFORE they start moving their stuff in.
- Set up your rules and don’t budge. I’m not sure if I’m actually allergic to roaches but my gma told me I was once so I HATE them. So no food scraps or crumbs anywhere for any extended period of time. I haf to drill this so hard it actually started fights, but it’s finally where it needs to be.
- Help each other. I can’t imagine living with someone I wasn’t comfortable with. One amazing thing about living with your friends is you will both sympathize with each other. He knows how busy I get and he is always helping me with my chores I dont have time to do. And since I’m the amazing budgeter, he knows to come to me with money issues before anyone.
- Run a tight ship. Even if you arent insane enough to cram 3 people in a studio, the more people in your place, the better you need to keep it together. Think, everyone leaves their towel in the bathroom, everyone throws their change on the table, and everyone keeps their lighters everywhere. Shit piles up quick so get it together.
- Get your designated spaces. Eric has his drawer and I have mine. Eric has my chrarger and I have mine. Eli is the exception to the rule because 2 yr. olds have no concept of privacy or personal space.
- Get alternating schedules. Maybe not in the beginning. If your space is super small, though, you WILL get sick of each other. Especially if you only have a door to the bathroom.
- Turn the goddamn lights off. Open the curtains it’s light out. Just because it’s the rule, especially if only one person pays utilities.
- Company. Always give notice when you are having company, so anal 20 somethings will have time to clean and put on eyeliner.
- Utilize every square inch of space. Because, a foot above the fridge, a foot above the tv, five inches under the bed, that one empty kitchen drawer, all that empty space will literally save you wll the time in the world. I recently bought six shelves and they are all, now totally full and amazing.
So there ya gooo!!! Roomates can be awesome and annoying, and they definitely arent for everyone. But it’s another awesome way to save money and help you in a chaotic and lonely world.
Coffee is the key. To everything I think… As dysfunctional as I may be, coffee keeps me moderately sane.
The second key, however happens to be money. My life is a struggle between wanting high-end coffee drinks and saving my hard earned money. So I’ve been looking into it and I think I found the perfect-o recipe to an amazing Starbucksks- ish macchiato.
Step 1: Drench the glass- Typically it would just be caramel but I added a lil sumn-sumn.
Step 2: Add vanilla- 2 tbps give or take depending on glass size and personal preference.
Step 3: Add milk- Fill a little under 1/2 full. Vanilla Almond milk is my favorite. If you’re a wimp this is the stage to add extra creamer.
Step 4: Add coffee or espresso- Obviously espresso is the best choice, but if you dont have it make a super small, super strong brew. Good coffee is key for this one. Leave a little space for the goodies at the top. (Or not if you want to make it light.)
Step 5: Add ice or not. Makes it more chuggable.
Step 6: Dress it up! Top it off like a frappucino and enjoy your coffee and your savings 😍
Hope ya enjoyed it! Trying to add some variety to the things I put on here so I’ll add some of the weird other things I do to save a few bucks. Cuz every penny counts!
The first time one of my regulars called me a workaholic, I gotta admit, my chest swelled with pride. Now, I hear almost daily “Do you ever go home?” (Rarely.)
Everyone loves hearing what a hard worker they are, but sometimes it comes at a cost. Month two of doubles, after a meeting with my boss about the direction of my career, my legs gave out standing up. I literally faceplanted in front of my boss.
I wasnt just embarrased, I became extremely concerned about the toll of the physical and psychological stress I was under. The money was good, but was it worth possibly destroying my body?
If you are going to be a crazy workaholic like myself, you’re going to have to take care of your health, or you could do permanent damage to yourself.
Now I’ve never been a great role model for good health. I smoke too much and I rely a bit too heavily on coffee. BUT, the way that I live depends on me being able to get up and go at any point in time, for hours and hours. Sooooo without further adieu, here are some good tips for maintaing your health as a workaholic:
- Mental health matters too: If you are breaking down in tears over, anything really, it might be a good idea to ask for a little extra time off to just come to terms with yourself. People will be sympathetic, if you’re willing to lay it out for them.
- Don’t sacrifice your sleep: Yes, I know you miss having fun. Yes, I know you want to watch tv and process the day. But disrupting your already chaotic sleep schedule can be absolutely destructive. Your body needs it. Your mind needs it. You need it.
- Eat often: Snacks rule. You’re tired and you’re cranky. You’re hangry and other people dont want to hear it. Don’t wait till break or when you get home keep lots of HEALTHY snack in your bag, in your pocket, in your desk, and in your car. Your coworkers/customers/sanity will thank you.
- Eat HEALTHY: You cannot survive on fast food and pizza. I tried. It does not work. Food is fuel and it can be nourishing and revitalizing or it can be garbage that makes you sluggish and tired.
- Exercise: This one is kind of meh, if you work on your feet for 16 hours a day. If I didn’t love both of my jobs, I would get one active and one sedentary. But regardless, if you’re sluggish and tired get up and move. It doesnt have to be a lot to be effective.
- Don’t let your hygiene suffer. Nothing is quite as demoralizing as waking up one day and realizing you can’t remember the last time you washed your hair. Make time to het yourself together before work, and if you have a second job, kepp toothpaste and a toothbrush, deodorant and a hairbrush on you or in your car.
- Keep your vices in check: I remember one specific incident that always reminds me to only cut loose if im not working. It involves a stress old 20yr. old and a bottle of tequila. Long story short, it did not end well. And if you smoke, don’t use stressed out or tired as an excuse to up the habit, if anything it should give you more of a reason to quit.
My last and final tip is to know when you need a break. One particular week of exactly 12 hours of sleep I broke down crying and called in for the first time in 2 years. But it had to be done. Don’t feel guilty for not being invincible.
Stay happy, stay positive, and happy hustling 😊
I’ve made a few buck with online surveys before. Usually very slowly, and with a lot of time involved.
However, three months ago after reading some random blog about surveys, I downloaded like ten that wasted my time, plus Quickthoughts. Guys, this is a good one.
Okay, so occasionally you get a “mission”- mine included going to our local Walgreens and taking pictures of their candy stand and answering questions. This paid 20$ in Amazon gift cards. The minimum payout is $20. Haven’t got one of them since, but I check it everyday when on break, or during my down time. I also hear you get a lot more missions in bigger cities.
I’ve made about $60 so far. Right now I have $30, and I’m saving it for a new pair of work shoes.
You won’t make a ton of money using it, but it will save you money on things you’d be buying anyways.
A little off the subject, but, My here’s my best tips for using survey apps
- Download several at a time.
- Keep the notifications turned on.
- Check them daily.
- Keep you location turned on.
- Keep your phone charged, so you dont miss out!
Here’s the link to Quickthoughts: http://www.quickthoughtsapp.com.
10/10 def. recommend it.